UNAIR NEWS – Toxic relationship is a relationship that is full of stress, violence, and has a negative impact on the mental health of the people involved in it. Unfortunately, toxic relationships can happen to anyone. What are the dangers? Let’s delve into them.

A lecturer of the Faculty of Psychology, Universitas Airlangga (UNAIR), Margaretha SPsi PGDip Psych MSc, said that one of the important factors in human mental health is social relationships. Healthy relationships can help one feel good and grow personally. However, toxic relationships hinder mental health and stifle personal growth.

“People with good social relationships with family, friends and colleagues will be more mentally healthy. Having positive relationships in one’s life builds happiness. Meanwhile, someone in a cycle of toxic relationships will be more prone to stress and psychological problems,” she said.

Hinder self-development

Toxic relationships hinder self-development. “Toxic relationships may occur in the work environment. People can work in an environment that does not support self-development because of jealousy, aggression, and spreading rumors. Finally, people in it do not have the will to develop,” she explained.

Toxic relationships make people apathetic. One sign of mental health is being able to contribute to society. “If you are in a toxic relationship, someone is already overwhelmed with their life problems. So, in the end, they will tend to focus on themselves and not be able to show genuine concern for others around them. People who only focus on themselves will find it difficult to achieve true mental health,” she said.

How to end toxic relationship

Margaretha disclosed few ways to end toxic relationship. First, one should have positive self-esteem. People with positive self-esteem will not allow a toxic partner to control them on a daily basis. In contrast, people with negative self-esteem will feel powerless and find it hard to end the relationship.

This situation can happen in relationships between coworkers, bosses, partners, and family members. “We should know if our relationship is toxic. Then we can decide what to do or how to get out of this negative situation,” she elaborated.

Secondly, people around victims of toxic relationships should support them. This helps them regain their self-esteem and be empowered to end the negative aspects of their relationship. Trained personnel can also provide professional support.

“If you need help managing relationship problems, professionals like psychologists, counselors, and social workers can provide guidance. It can include advice on how to handle toxic relationships. The approach should align with the context. For instance, if the toxic relationship is classified as domestic violence, the helper can offer guidance on stopping violence and ways to stay safe. It might even be worth discussing whether it’s necessary to report the violence to the police or whether separation or divorce is the best way to solve the problem,” she said.

Third, rehabilitation. People who have been in toxic relationships need time to recover. Usually, being in a toxic relationship harms mental health, like stress, depression, or the emergence of behavioral problems. “People who have been in toxic relationships need recovery and ongoing counseling assistance. The goal is to make them safer, calmer, and more confident in building the next life,” she concluded.

Author: Icha Nur Imami Puspita

Editor: Khefti Al Mawalia